It is Saturday, 12 days ago I talked to the professor and asked for assignments. I had two weeks and two assignments: find the measurement and the stimuli.
For a week I did nothing, I just adapted to the new routine, took care of my physical needs and rested. The second week, though, has been the closest to what I always wanted my life to look like. Wake up in my safe and comfortable home, go to the lab, think about the questions I am interested in, talk to interesting people who have a thing and a direction in their lives, come home, eat the same food and do the same things, sleep. Repeat.
The structure allowed me to think again. Thinking and understanding are my favorite activities. This was heaven.
I also came to some realizations; came to understand how science really works and what can I do with the things and the people available to me and what is unrealistic and not worth my and other people's time. I received all the information that was available in my environment. I grew up.
It is Saturday.
I haven't fulfilled my assignments, I decided to go with the stimuli and ask for more time for the assay: Say what you did, Ask what you need and apologize briefly when it ACTUALLY OWED.
Today I will combine this and that paper and will decide on the stimuli. I sit on the chair, what was that lofi song? din din din .... dindindidididiiiim.
It had "Time" in the title.
Search, search, search, nothing.
Go through my lofi playlists, nothing.
It had "Memory" in it.
Search, search, search ...... nothing.
I find other beautiful soundtracks on the way, but none of them are THE one. I convince myself that these are better. That one was making me a bit sad anyway. I should not lie to myself. Be honest, you couldn't find it and now you are looking for ways to soothe yourself. Yes, I want to find it. I go through my downloads, I have to have that song somewhere. If it is lives inside my brain, I have it somewhere. This is not random.
Hoogway and HM Surf, and No Sprit are my top candidates. I search everything, ONE HOUR has passed from the mumbling it. Three songs are in my downloads, none of them from these artists. One of them is titled "Melted" I play it, and quickly go to the middle. It is familiar but not it? I search in youtube and the moment I do, the full search comes up, I have done this before and the history remebers. It goes to ☃️Chillhop Essentials - Winter 2019 [cozy & chill hiphop beats] and it fucking doesn't have timestamps, I skip and there it is ... the intro I was playing in my mind. It is "Melted" from Hazy year and C4C. I search it as a solo soundtrack, there it is. I found it.
It was there, I was looking at it, I wasn't seeing it, I wasn't hearing it.
The lofigirl part was partially correct, the artistis that I have heard alongside this song in the same playlist was right, but they were not it. They were indicators to it.
And was it really the winter of 2019? no, summer of 2021.
I get attracted to the same things eventually. I have all the pieces of the puzzle, already. I need to put them together. I always find what I am looking for, I just need to see and hear and know that I will find what I am looking for. That is what I do.
Less than 6 hours to find the stimuli.
